Soooo Much Better Than a Space Pen

Okay, perhaps I've been putting in entirely too much time with the books. I may as well be chained to my desk here at the house. I feel like I'm truly missing the fall, my favorite time of the year. Courtesy of this ridiculous schedule I've thrown myself into, I've missed the mornings becoming crisper, walks with my dog, grabbing coffee with my wife, most college football games (although UGA isn't playing that well), and most playoff baseball games (although the Bosox faded in September).

This weekend, I did allow myself to watch a couple of baseball games and pledged to promptly get a TiVo. How hot are the Tigers? I'm liking them to win it all; they're en fuego. (Now, your turn to make some "racially insensitive" jokes and get fired.) Seriously, how great was Magg's walk-off homer to win the series? It was fate, wasn't it? Didn't you just know he was going to crush it? That is October. And baseball. And all things good about life.

On the plus side of studying so much, I've started having nutty dreams again. Here's what made me wake up laughing this morning:

In my dream, I was about to buy a pen that recycled feces into ink. The advertisements remarked that it would never run dry because it ran on biofuel. As I really, really hate running out of ink and consume my daily recommended amount of fiber, I suppose I was the ideal customer. Basically, you drop a deuce, collect it, put it into you pen, and you're ready to write. How simple is that?

The pen itself was larger than a jumbo tube of toothpaste with an enormous opening at end, presumably for loading. It was a bright shiny red, almost like a color you'd see on an expensive sportscar. It came in standard size and a limited edition, "supermodel" version which had a much, much smaller fuel capacity. It was a size difference on the order of putting a giant, novelty cigar next to a Virginia Slims cigarette.

I should get one of these things. Then, everything I wrote really would be crap. I've a sneaking suspicion, though, that the reality wouldn't be nearly as impressive. It would, however, break me of chewing on my pen.