The Answer for Everything
So I'm talking to the gang the other morning just before we submitted our exams. Everyone was pretty spent after stressing over it all damned weekend. Naturally, we started discussing our strategies for getting through the difficult problems and what we put down for your answers.
Know how I got a 99? Below is a sample three part question from the exam and my answer to each part.
- The elements in the periodic table are arranged according to similar outer-shell electron configurations. These electron configurations are the basis of the periodic or cyclic patterns in certain physical properties of atoms.
A) Rank these elements in order of the increasing second ionization energy (IE2). Explain your reasoning. (6 points)
B) In the p-block elements, does the n value or the Z-eff appear to have greater effect on the atomic radius as you move diagonally from one element to the element one row down and one column to the right? Explain your reasoning. (6 points)
C) If you obtained the photoelectron spectra of the main-group elements in the second and third periods of the periodic table, what trends would you observe (if any) in (1) number of peaks; (2) position of the peak farthest to the right in each spectrum; and (3) height of peaks? Consider the trends moving down a group and across a row. (6 points)
Answer, part A:
Answer, part B:
Answer, part C:
I think this strategy just might get me through Organic Chemistry in the fall. Hell, it might even make medical school interviews go more smoothly:
"Can you describe your thoughts on the legislation prohibiting partial birth abortion and its overall impact on women's health?"
"Certainly. Might I ask how many puppies are involved?," I'd retort.
"Ummm, well... You see, it's not exactly... I'm not sure how pupp--"
"-- Because if there is one thing that I love, it is a cute, adorable puppy. Let me show you this picture of Mr. Bojangles, my pup," I'd add while unfolding a picture of a puppy.
"Say, that's one cute puppy."
Anyway, it's just a thought.
Don't Sprinkle When You Tinkle
Go ahead and file this under TMI (Too Much Information) about me.
Today, five minutes before lab. I ran to the restroom because I was about to burst. I'm standing at the urinal after a long relieving "evacuation." I button up and go to wash my hands. In the mirror, to my extreme horror, I notice a clearly visible drip.
My mind was racing. What the hell was I going to do? No way in hell I could go back into the classroom. I'm standing alone in the bathroom, having an audible conversation with myself in the mirror. "I'm wearing quick-dry shorts but they won't dry that quick," I yell at myself. I try a paper towel which only spreads it around and makes it even more noticeable. I even bend over and am blowing on my crotch to dry it a little faster. Nothing is working. I'm out of time because class is starting so I resort to the old standby. I turn the water on as high as it'll go, then just put my hands under the faucet and pretend to wash my hands. Instead of using a towel to dry, I immediately shake all the water off ensuring that it goes all over the front of my pants and shirt. Then, I dry my hands and walk back to the class prepared to give the "Looks like there isn't enough money at this damned place to have a pressure control valve on the sink in the men's room. Look at me, I'm soaked!" speech.
Midway to the classroom, however, I just decided to be done with it and take off my pants.
Problem solved.
Godfather III
Today, I get home and sit down for a 15 minute TV break. I flip on the telly and surf past AMC. "Godfather III" is showing. Normally, I'd keep on rolling past that one. Today, though, I stopped to watch what are probably my favorite five minutes of the film. Know which five? The part where Mary Corleone (Sophia Coppola) gets whacked. I didn't even have to waste two and a half hours watching her brutish dialogue delivery or limited acting range while praying she'd just get killed already. Just flipped by it and, BANG! BANG!, her character dies. Awesome. Man, I'm still pissed at her for acting in that one. It could've been a great, or at least really good, film. I'm thrilled that she's taken up writing and directing and left acting to those with some on-screen charisma.
Answer, part B:
Answer, part C:
I think this strategy just might get me through Organic Chemistry in the fall. Hell, it might even make medical school interviews go more smoothly:
"Can you describe your thoughts on the legislation prohibiting partial birth abortion and its overall impact on women's health?"
"Certainly. Might I ask how many puppies are involved?," I'd retort.
"Ummm, well... You see, it's not exactly... I'm not sure how pupp--"
"-- Because if there is one thing that I love, it is a cute, adorable puppy. Let me show you this picture of Mr. Bojangles, my pup," I'd add while unfolding a picture of a puppy.
"Say, that's one cute puppy."
Anyway, it's just a thought.
Don't Sprinkle When You Tinkle
Go ahead and file this under TMI (Too Much Information) about me.
Today, five minutes before lab. I ran to the restroom because I was about to burst. I'm standing at the urinal after a long relieving "evacuation." I button up and go to wash my hands. In the mirror, to my extreme horror, I notice a clearly visible drip.
My mind was racing. What the hell was I going to do? No way in hell I could go back into the classroom. I'm standing alone in the bathroom, having an audible conversation with myself in the mirror. "I'm wearing quick-dry shorts but they won't dry that quick," I yell at myself. I try a paper towel which only spreads it around and makes it even more noticeable. I even bend over and am blowing on my crotch to dry it a little faster. Nothing is working. I'm out of time because class is starting so I resort to the old standby. I turn the water on as high as it'll go, then just put my hands under the faucet and pretend to wash my hands. Instead of using a towel to dry, I immediately shake all the water off ensuring that it goes all over the front of my pants and shirt. Then, I dry my hands and walk back to the class prepared to give the "Looks like there isn't enough money at this damned place to have a pressure control valve on the sink in the men's room. Look at me, I'm soaked!" speech.
Midway to the classroom, however, I just decided to be done with it and take off my pants.
Problem solved.
Godfather III
Today, I get home and sit down for a 15 minute TV break. I flip on the telly and surf past AMC. "Godfather III" is showing. Normally, I'd keep on rolling past that one. Today, though, I stopped to watch what are probably my favorite five minutes of the film. Know which five? The part where Mary Corleone (Sophia Coppola) gets whacked. I didn't even have to waste two and a half hours watching her brutish dialogue delivery or limited acting range while praying she'd just get killed already. Just flipped by it and, BANG! BANG!, her character dies. Awesome. Man, I'm still pissed at her for acting in that one. It could've been a great, or at least really good, film. I'm thrilled that she's taken up writing and directing and left acting to those with some on-screen charisma.
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